I've forgotten to post a bunch of winners and that's too bad. you should all be sad, but you're a little smarter for not having read them.
Here's a good one:
Some Class: "Q: If you do not know Arabic, is it possible to learn Arabic from an Arabic dictionary?
1. No. You would need a definition in another language, or a picture, to understand the meaning of a word. Otherwise it is like trying to describe color to a blind man, or fashion to Donald Trump."
OOOOH! Got 'im!
Some Other Class: "a) A prime number is a number that cannot be made by being multiplied by a number other than 1 and itself.
b) A prime person would be Michael Jackson i would say."
Oh. me too.
Government: "If he takes to himself another woman, he may not reduce her food, her clothing, or her conjugal rights. It seems pretty self-explanitory to me. If you are a gent and you find yourself a nice little lass, do not treat her as a lesser."
This guy is like my dream man. I love how he somehow makes treating his little lass equally still sound derogatory.
SS 2: "I LIKE MACARONI AND CHEESE BECAUSE IT TASTE GOOD AND SOMETHING
I CAN EAT REALLY FAST."
Luckily for him, we only grade 2nd grade on completion....
SS 3: "When I went to NorthCarolina I went to the fun farm. "
... fun(ny) farm?